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20 novembre 2007 2 20 /11 /novembre /2007 03:55

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Economic Models explained with cows - 2007 update

SOCIALISM
You have 2  cows.
You give one to your neighbour.

COMMUNISM
You have 2  cows.
The State takes both and gives you some milk.

FASCISM
You have 2  cows.
The State takes both and sells you some milk.

NAZISM
You have 2  cows.
The State takes both and shoots you.

BUREAUCRATISM
You have 2  cows.
The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws  the
milk away...

TRADITIONAL  CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell  one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
You sell  them and retire on the income.

SURREALISM
You have two  giraffes.
The government requires you to take harmonica lessons  

AN AMERICAN  CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell  one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
Later, you hire a  consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.

ENRON VENTURE  CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell  three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters
of credit opened  by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a
debt/equity swap with an  associated general offer so that you get all four cows
back, with a tax  exemption for five cows.
The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via  an intermediary to a
Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority  shareholder who sells
the rights to all seven cows back to your listed  company. The annual report
says the company owns eight cows, with an option  on one more. You sell one
cow to buy a new president of the United States,  leaving you with nine cows.
No balance sheet provided with the  release.
The public then buys your bull.

THE ANDERSEN  MODEL
You have two cows.
You shred  them.

A FRENCH  CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on  strike, organise a riot, and block the roads, because you
want three  cows.

A JAPANESE  CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You  redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and
produce  twenty times the milk.
You then create a clever cow cartoon image called  'Cowkimon' and market
it worldwide.

A GERMAN  CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You  re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and
milk  themselves.

AN ITALIAN  CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don't  know where they are.
You decide to have lunch.

A RUSSIAN  CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You count  them and learn you have five cows.
You count them again and learn you have 42  cows.
You count them again and learn you have 2 cows.
You stop counting  cows and open another bottle of vodka.

A SWISS  CORPORATION
You have 5000 cows. None of them  belong to you.
You charge the owners for storing them.

A CHINESE  CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have  300 people milking them.
You claim that you have full employment, and high  bovine productivity.
You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.  

AN INDIAN  CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You  worship them.

A BRITISH  CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Both are  mad.

AN IRAQI  CORPORATION
Everyone thinks you have lots of  cows.
You tell them that you have none.
No-one believes you, so they bomb  the **** out of you and invade your
country. You still have no cows, but at  least now you are part of a
Democracy....

A NEW ZEALAND  CORPORATION
You have two cows.
The one on  the left looks very attractive.

AN AUSTRALIAN  CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Business  seems pretty good.
You close the office and go to the beach for a few beers to  celebrate
 

PS: Photo ci-jointe, karting avec Mark, Sanna, Troy et Chris pour l'anniversaire de Mark

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